It's been a while since I've participated
in a Romantic Friday Writers challenge. This one was:
We’re looking for chilling stories of ghosts and haunted locations – and maybe even love from beyond the grave.
A romantic element is essential, but we’re looking for stories with a thrilling edge of fear to add to the romantic tension building between our Hero/Heroine.
I chose to highlight a section from my work in progress,
Possessing Karma. In this story, Karma (going by Kay) has recently moved in to a refurbished
town home in New Orleans ’ French
Quarter. She and Philippe, her neighbor, have both lost time while together
with only flashes of memory implying they were sexually involved. Karma thinks
she’s going crazy. Philippe suspects something paranormal.
In this scene, Philippe has just come home to secure everything
against a coming tropical storm. This 979 word selection is from chapter seven..
I look forward to hearing your thoughts.
He stopped, before
her door. “Kay? I heard you come up earlier. Just wanted to know if you needed
help with the shutters.”
Waiting, he laid
his forehead against the plaster wall. He listened, anticipating the creak of
her stairs, the metallic click of her lock… nothing.
“Huh,” he muttered
to himself and knocked again. Still no response.
“Okay, then.” He
turned the key in his own door and went inside. It was almost as muggy as
outdoors.
Stooping low he
untied his work boots and left them on the mat by the door. He wasn’t a neat
freak, but didn’t want to risk tracking debris from the workshop over the
polished wood. Someday he hoped he’d just think of them as functional floors
instead of works of art. He unclasped the buckles on his overalls and stepped
out them. He hooked one foot under them and kicked them in the general vicinity
of the laundry hamper in the closet off the kitchen.
The wind rattled
the windows again, howling around the building in harmony with a roll of
thunder. In his socks and boxers, he stepped into the rain pelting the second
floor balcony outside his living room and closed the shutters over the windows.
After securing the bars in place, he closed himself back inside, pulling the bright
green shutters closed behind him then locked the French doors.
So much for
needing a shower. He stripped off his soaked socks and padded upstairs,
checking that he didn’t leave puddles in his wake. Uncaring if anyone saw him in
his shorts in the storm, he stepped out onto the third floor balcony outside
his bedroom. Nope, he wouldn’t need a shower after this. The stinging assualted
him, the drops almost angry in their wind driven strength, each drop a shock of
cold in the trapped heat radiating from the city.
Barefoot and soaked,
Philippe turned his back to the storm and focused on his task at hand. Two out
of three French door shutters secured, he turned to watch the storm. The sting
of the rain nothing against the chaos of the sky, of the haze blurred rooftops
spread before him. Shielding his eyes against the wind, he leaned over the
figured iron balustrade to look around the tall wood fencing separating his
balcony from Kay’s.
She stood there,
driving rain plastering her long hair to her neck and shoulders. For someone
naked and soaking on her balcony in the face of lightning, she looked relaxed –
her hands in soft repose, laying gently on the ironwork. He wanted to sculpt
her.
Was she crazy?
“What are you
doing?” He shouted over the next rumble of thunder.
She simply turned
her head, looking at him, her eyes an eerie silver glimmer in against the rich
cocoa of her skin.
“Secure your
shutters and get inside!”
Her lips curved
into a smile, as if she were amused by him. She did not respond, but turned to
face him. Placing one hand on her breast, she gasped and closed her eyes. He watched,
spellbound, as her fingers traced tiny swirls in the water drops, never quite
touching her nipple.
He pushed his wet
hair from his face, watching the water stream down her naked body. A rivulet
started at her shoulders, flowing in sleek plains down her breasts, to join in
the center and stream down her abdomen. She was glorious, one with the storm.
Yes, he had to sculpt her – but first he had to get her inside.
Crazy woman.
“Don’t you want to
touch me?” Her soft voice carried over the storm.
“Kay, get inside.”
She looked
different somehow. Maybe it was just a trick of the light, but her skin seemed
darker. And, of course, she was naked. He’d seen her partially nude before, but
made a point not to stare. Right now, there was no way around it.
“I knew you would
come for me.”
“Kay, are you
nuts? This isn't just rain – the wind can carry debris, there will be lightning.”
She seemed to have
no issue with her vulnerable state. If anything, she welcomed him.
“You need me. I’m
under your skin, a sickness in you.” Her voice echoed in his mind, clear and
soft in spite of the steady drum of the rain.
His skin tingled,
a shiver running down his spine. Philippe gasped at the jolt of sensation, of
the soft caress of the rain, the almost painful pleasure of the pressure of the
wind against his finger tips, tickling his scalp. Stepping back he looked at
his own hands, sure he was in dream.
His arms reached
toward the divider, straining with an uncoordinated heaviness. With a crash,
the boards splintered, flying around him. He felt himself wince at the stinging
pain above his brow. Lifting one hand to his forehead, he laughed when it came
back slick with blood. He gulped greedy breaths at the joy of sensation,
marveling at his living body. The way the muscles of his abdomen contracted
with each breath, the taste of soot that coated each raindrop, it was
magnificent.
Barefoot on the
tile, he took one heavy step, then another until she was an arm’s breadth away.
“I knew you would
come for me. You have no choice – not any longer.”
“I crave you
always.” He reached for her just as lightning split the sky. In that single
burst of light, she seemed to glow, outlined by a reflection of herself.
Philippe fought
against her pull, against his own body’s response. What was he doing here? It
wasn’t safe. Instead he heard his own voice say, “Does that please you? Does
the surety of my desire make you feel powerful?”
She smiled, smug
and sensual. God, how he wanted her – he always did, always would.
The back of his fingers
grazed along her cheek, her jaw. Her responsive shiver sent a dusting of goose
bumps all over her skin.
“This body pleases
me.”
This is a collage of inspiring images for my project. Karma is a religious studies professor, Philippe is a chainsaw sculptor.
18 comments:
Ooh- er - I like the way you used the elements of the violent storm to emphasis the emotions and turmoils of your characters.
Nice imagery.
Have both been possessed or just her?
He's definitely acting like a real man, she's more spooky, ethereal.
Can't wait to find out the answers!
You write spooky demon possessions very well. I held my breath for a while. :)
Steamy and well-written.
Suggestion: avoid cliches like "neat freak". It weakens the writing.
Reading just this section for the first time in ages, I caught tons of word repetition. Yikes.
Thank you for the feedback.
@ Yolanda, she's already possessed and he is in process of being possessed, ending the selection with his body being used. If that didn't come across, then I need to revise.
You painted the scene very well...there is a hint of sensuality blending with the power and rawness of the storm ~
Enjoyed this read ~
Definitely creepy & romantic. I like how you developed Philippe's character. Your story gripped me from the beginning and held me until the end. Lovely. :)
Hi,
Nicely executed with the storm driving the scene and sparking the atmosphere. Then the tawny beauty of woman embracing the fury of the elements. Deadly attractive and sensually potent story. Lovely!
;)
best
F
Hi Erin
Possessed lovers, very creepy. If I where Philippe I'd be asking who is this woman. But then he is enchanted. Well written. Welcome back.
Nancy
What a powerful, elemental story Erin. The storm evoked primal emotions. Very sensual descriptions. A perfect story for the horror 'fest.
I see you're powering along, completing so many novels. How is your quest for representation going? I wish you every success and thank you so much for popping up again on our submissions board! :D
Best of luck with the judging! I'm glad it's Ann and Nas who have to choose from this awesome lineup! :D
Sensual and elemental. Great imagery and visual effects. Wow, this is totally out there. I am intrigued Erin.
......dhole
Stormy, steamy and scary! Good combination ;)
Turbulent, emotional, and somewhat erotic. Nice description of the storm playing on bare skin.
I like her ethereal personality. Nicely done and perfect for the this prompt.
Dear Erin,
I don't need to repeat all the praise you already have received for this story. I agree! It is sensual and captivating. Wonderful blend of the brewing storm and their naked bodies outside in the rain and idea that she or both of them are possessed.
I am so glad that you decided yo participate in this challenge for Halloween. I think I would like reading your novels. I'll try to do that.
Thank you so much for your kind words about my story. It means a lot to me. It keeps me wanting to try a little harder.
Hope to read your text for the next challenge in December, Holiday Spirit. I will try to participate too.
Best wishes,
Anna
For the benefit of other readers:
RFW No. 46 - 'Jenny Holland's Robinson Crusoe Halloween'
Whoa, this definitely sent chills down my spine. I think you could give the "50 Shades of Grey" author a run for your money. :P So much going on here -- I liked it!
Apologies, I am just now getting through all of the House of Horrors excerpts. Hope you're having a great weekend!
~Wendy Lu
The Red Angel Blog
A sensuous story and if this is how you write, i am ready to read your novel. There is music in your words and poetry in your expressions :)
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